


If I Lose You, I Don’t Think I’ll Find You Again

by lostinthesounds



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bellarke, F/M, Season six speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-06
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2020-04-06 05:03:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19055782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostinthesounds/pseuds/lostinthesounds
Summary: Bellamy wakes up after the serum wears off in a unknown place, and comes to realize that Clarke was now, really Josephine Lightbourne.That doesn’t sit well with him, at all.





	If I Lose You, I Don’t Think I’ll Find You Again

**Author's Note:**

> AHHH!! my second bellarke season six speculation fic is finally out. (I’ve been working on this for a week, I’m actually drained.) 
> 
> But! I’ve worked super hard on this baby and hope it delivers what I wanted to get across. All I’m saying is that Bellamy better use his heart and do anything to save Clarke, and I need that desperately. Please, enjoy! 
> 
>  
> 
> EDIT: just wanted to say that I’m insanely happy and over the moon over the sudden announcement that Bob and Eliza are MARRIED. Feel free to check their twitter pages to confirm, it’s absolutely insane. I’m so so happy for them and I can’t believe it. Oh my god!

“Look who’s finally awake?” A voice calls out to Bellamy, who’s hands are clasped behind his back with rope ties and hair disheveled. His eyes opened slowly, as he got used to his body again. 

 

He tries to shake his arms out, having difficulty with the strain of his muscles but he does it anyways. With a pounding headache, a ache in his heart that he can’t describe, and his memories slowly coming back to him, Bellamy could feel his world shake with reality. 

 

He says the name mindlessly, hoping if he whispered her name it wouldn’t be real. If he spoke softly, would it change everything? Would Clarke be in front of him again? 

 

It comes out gentle, like his voice wouldn’t instinctively be filled with a deep anger only reserved for her. 

 

“Clarke?” It came out naturally, and he tries to ignore the way his heart was screaming at him. She was in trouble, he could tell. He remembered and then suddenly the words left his mouth before he realized, “Josephine?” 

 

He doesn’t hear an answer straight away but he hears shuffling. Bellamy doesn’t panic, knowing it’s too late to worry for anything concerning his safety, and he looks around. It wouldn’t hurt to know his surroundings, so he takes in the small  room that’s bland and boring in all it’s glory. The only other thing beside him was a wooden table, two glasses of water and a few viles of whatever Josephine stuck into his neck earlier. 

 

If he thinks hard enough, he should be able to remember how Russel and the other primes were able to sedate the previous test subject for Josephine, and how he should stop them. But, does he want to hurt Josephine? It’s the one question that keeps him alert in his chair. 

 

If it was any other person; Murphy, Emori, Raven or even his sister, he would’ve been more aggressive. Bellamy would’ve fought Josephine in the valley, he _wouldn’t_ of gotten distracted with the realization of Josephine in a body that he wished he could hold at night. He _wouldn’t_ of let his emotions get to his head and ruin everything, because he had a plan before walking up to her. 

 

Before he walked up to someone that took over Clarke’s body. But like the old Bellamy who understood his heart more than any decision he thought he could make, his mind had completely stopped thinking rationally as soon as his suspicions became real. He was right all along, ever since the night at the party. 

 

Bellamy repeats again, his voice rough. 

 

“Josephine?” He says, looking around for a flash of blonde hair because she really couldn’t of hid for so long without him noticing. The name sounds so foreign coming from his mouth, like it’s something he should spit out instead of letting it sink in. He won’t let it become familiar, he _had_ to save Clarke. “It’s not a big room to hide from me.” His voice is raspy, he noticed. 

 

Suddenly, Clarke’s (No.. _Josephine_ ) head is heavy on his right shoulder and she rests there like it’s not a problem. When it most definitely was.  

 

“Hello there,” She teases, playful and sweet. She looks at him as he tries to pull away from her, like it was a test. Her eyes watching his every move as she continues, “Okay good, I had to make sure you were awake. _God_ , it was getting so boring waiting for you.” 

 

Bellamy practically has to force himself to take deep breaths, not used to this quirky and innocent side of the girl he doesn’t know, but _still_ knows everything about. This wasn’t Clarke, this wasn’t _his_ Clarke. 

 

“Get off me,” He demands, and he doesn’t move. “You can’t do that.” 

 

 _It’s not Clarke_. It’s the only reason why he doesn’t let her stay there, because it’s not someone he knows. 

 

“Hmmm,” Josephine questions, nuzzling into his neck like his lover and looks at Bellamy’s face sideways. He feels like he can’t breathe, “Why? Cause I’m not your girlfriend, I bet.” 

 

His jaw tightens, because although things broke off with Echo a few days ago, she had no right to tease him like that. It was an annoyance that creeped under his skin, taunting him with what he never had. 

 

“You’re right,” He looks away, unable to meet her eyes. He tries to shake off the feeling of guilt and sorrow because Clarke never, _they_ never—“You aren’t my girlfriend, or my friend, so you can’t do stuff like that.” 

 

“Clarke wished she was, though.” The mystery of a woman said, twirling a strand of Clarke’s hair between her fingers as she moved away. Bellamy wants to forget about the warmth that was now leaving his body due to her moving, but he doesn’t think much of it. 

 

“You don’t know her, you don’t know any of us.” 

 

Bellamy swallows thickly, his eyes narrowed on the way Josephine stood in front of him. Her shoulders slightly slumped and carefree, arms holding her upright as she leans against the wall. He couldn’t think about what she said to him because it might cause a whirlwind of emotions that he doesn’t need to acknowledge right now. 

 

“See, that’s where you’re wrong.” She says, and his heart was beating so hard in his chest that he wasn’t sure if he heard right. “Clarke is dead, but I can still channel her memories. It’s the perks of living in her body,” Josephine has the nerve, the absolute _nerve_ , to smile at him. “It’s fascinating, right?” 

 

“No, it’s _really_ not.” Bellamy snapped back in response, throat burning. 

 

“Well, I guess you’re wrong about that too because I personally find it to be wonderful.” Josephine frowns and then shrugs, “But, I do need you for something and I know Clarke relied on you more than anyone else she knew.” 

 

 _She was dead_. He repeats her words in his brain, then again, _I know she relied on you more than anyone else she knew_.

 

It was spoken in past tense, like Josephine truly believed that Clarke would never come back. She had believed that Clarke was dead by her father’s hand, like every other subject that had fallen into the unfortunate sequence of events. 

 

Should he believe it too? 

 

“She’s not dead,” Bellamy said. He couldn’t believe it, he can’t put that burden on his chest. Not only would his mind explode, but his heart would burst into a million pieces that held Clarke Griffin together. “I know she isn’t, and you can’t have that much power and control over her.” 

 

Josephine stood straighter, her back off the wall and she was walking to Bellamy in small strides, the most effort to stay in control. 

 

She leaned into his face, admiring the features on the man’s face and all he could do was watch and do the same. It was messing with his brain, Bellamy had to keep convincing himself that it wasn’t Clarke’s soft eyes looking into his gaze telling him words that ensured that he meant the world to her, that she would never leave him. It was Josephine Lightbourne, a woman he had no knowledge or control over, a woman with seven lives because her parents don’t know how to grieve. 

 

They simply don’t want to experience pain, when Bellamy had gone through a _lifetime_ of aches and heart wrenching loss. 

 

“It’s the weirdest thing, I can definitely tell you that.” Josephine says in awe, her eyes (Clarke’s blue eyes, if he could find the voice to respond) but he even gets lost in them. “Everytime I look at you, I feel so many things. Sadness, neglect, immediate trust, and love. I haven’t felt like this in so long.” 

 

Bellamy ignores the pounding in his heart that has his ears ringing, and he doesn't look away. If he was going to defeat the problem, he had to face it head on. 

 

“You felt like this before?” 

 

“Once, a long time ago.” Josephine says softly, and she doesn’t have that hard glare in her eyes anymore. She was actually reminiscing, “That’s the person I’m trying to go back to, he was the one person I ever truly loved.” 

 

Bellamy nods, licking his lips when they become dry and he tries to find the right words to say. He can’t let his emotions get to him, he can’t let the words he really wants to say come out of his mouth or else he would be in trouble. He doesn’t want to risk not knowing what Josephine’s plan was, if he ended up being so stubborn. 

 

“But you’re Clarke Griffin, not the girl you were centuries ago.” 

 

“Clarke is dead,” Josephine bites back, as she breaks their gaze and steps away from the man in front of her. “I’m Josephine, not the girl _you_ know.” 

 

“You can’t erase the life of another person, that’s impossible,” Bellamy shakes his head back and forth, simply choosing to not believe anything that comes out of Josephine’s mouth. If he shuts his eyes, closes them until they burn, would this be a nightmare? “Clarke isn’t dead, she can’t be.” 

 

“Well, I’d say it’s possible.” Josephine gestures to herself, a teasing smile on her face. 

 

“No, you just have a chip in your neck that takes over Clarke’s consciousness.” 

 

“You don’t get do you?” She questioned and gets closer to Bellamy, taking the step to kneel in front of him to look him in the eyes. “Clarke _is_ dead, and it’s a shame really. She died not knowing if she was going to see her friends again, not knowing if she would be alive after realizing what my parents would do to her.” 

 

Bellamy bites his lip to keep from trembling, and he’s at a loss for words. 

 

Josephine continued, “She’s been a great host so far, so I should thank you for being inconsiderate of her actions and feelings.” She paused, a tilted smile on her lips makes Bellamy look away and squirm. “I mean, you couldn’t stop her from hooking up with the doctor? If you really cared, you would’ve noticed the red flags from the beginning.” 

 

Bellamy’s voice is low, showing his fear and anticipation for the truth. “What do you mean?” 

 

“Oh, the doctor?” Josephine quirks, she runs her hand through the ends of blonde curls that fell onto her neck. “He was great, or at least Clarke thought so because she was the one who brought him back to her room.” Bellamy felt a shiver up his spine, realizing that Clarke only wanted to be loved and how she couldn’t of known the blindside. He cringed at the thought, but Josephine noticed. “Yeah, right? She could’ve done better in my opinion. But, he tried to turn her into the Children Of Gabriel and got caught by outsiders and killed himself.” 

 

Bellamy stayed quiet, too afraid to look at a girl that has Clarke’s memories, that has complete control over her body, and absolutely terrified that Clarke was gone forever. She _couldn’t_ —

 

“She’s not dead,” Bellamy said after a few seconds of silence, his voice firm and eyes narrowed. There was no way that a girl that survived the end of the world, could just vanish in the mind of the flame, of a chip that keeps people alive in spirit. “You can have her memories, all of it, but she’s _not_ dead.” 

 

“Honestly,” Josephine starts, rising to her feet again. “It’s no surprise that Clarke loved a man like you, you’re both stubborn with emotion and it’s getting exhausting.” _Loved_? She continued speaking after sneaking behind Bellamy in his chair, and smiling when his arms clenched with the pressure of her delicate hands on the rope knot. “So I’ll tell you what, if you can tell me how Clarke lived her life, I’ll let you go?” 

 

Through clenched teeth, Bellamy turns his head to the side. “If I say no? What would you do then?” 

 

He couldn’t move on from being told that Clarke had loved him, and he was determined to keep her trust and to do the right thing. _She loved him_? 

 

“Weren’t you the one that told me that happiness looked great on me?” She asks deviously, leaning forward to copy his notion and they locked eyes. Bellamy hated this, he hated seeing the bright blue color that used to light up when she saw her friends, when she saw _him_. “If you do this for me, I’ll be happy.” 

 

“I told Clarke that,” 

 

Josephine cuts him off, “You were talking to me, not her. So _technically_ —“

 

”No, I was talking to Clarke,” Bellamy replied, swallowing thickly when his throat feels tight with emotion. It was the truth, he hadn’t caught on to Clarke’s weird behavior in that moment and believed he was talking to her. “Do you not realize how long I’ve been waiting to tell her that?” 

 

Josephine pulls back, only to tug tighter on Bellamy’s restraints. 

 

“It’s a sob story, but I’m just taking a wild guess.” She answered, curious to the way Bellamy froze. He didn’t even react to her, “You left Clarke behind on a burning planet, even when you claimed to love her? To protect her at all costs? Where's that Bellamy? The old one who would’ve done anything for Clarke?” 

 

Bellamy felt the burn in his muscles, the strength it took to keep himself composed when the memories of Praimfaya had threatened to come back in full force. He closed his eyes, trying to find words to say, but his mouth opened to empty words. 

 

Josephine answered for him, “He’s dead too apparently, just like _dear_ Clarke.” 

 

“I did what she wanted me to do.” He grits out, hesitating to say anything more. 

 

“Oh, really?” She asks. “What do you think she wanted you to do on that fateful day, you can tell me. Clarke isn’t here, and she’ll never come back so come on,” She cups her ear with her right hand, urging Bellamy to speak. “ _Tell me_.” 

 

Bellamy knew it was a ploy to get him talking, knowing that Josephine kept repeating herself to get on his nerves. To get him to crack and pour his heart out into a conversation that would fuel Josephine’s desire to get what she wants.

 

”She wanted me to save our friends, to do the right thing.” He fights himself on the overwhelming feeling of remembering everything. How he felt, how it felt to leave his person behind on a burning planet, how much it physically hurt to survive without her. “Clarke, she wanted me to live.” 

 

“Is that what you wanted?” 

 

“Don’t _even_ ,” Bellamy gasped, “Don’t go there, you can’t.” 

 

His eyes are still shut closed, the ache was becoming unbearable. But, he would take it over forcing himself to acknowledge the pain in his heart. 

 

“You wanted to stay with her?” Josephine asked, and he could picture the smirk growing on her face. “You loved her that much? The rebel, the leader, the Bellamy Blake loved a woman that much that you were willing to _die_ for her?” 

 

 _I left her behind, I left her behind and we all die anyways_ , Bellamy remembered. 

 

“ _Clarke_ ,” He starts to say, tension building in his forehead as he tries to picture what she could say, what she would do if Josephine didn’t exist. He had to take a shot, a leap of faith. “I know you’re in there, I know you’re alive. You have to know that I never wanted to leave you, I—“ 

 

“Hey there,” Josephine squeezes his shoulder harshly, causing Bellamy to jump and open his eyes. He flinched while adjusting to the brightness again and maybe it could all be a dream, maybe he was back on the Ark with his mother and sister. It was a good thought while it lasted, as Bellamy slumped against his chair. “You don’t have a chance at getting her back.”’

 

His body limp, and his emotions at such a high he didn’t know what to do. 

 

“My life is built on taking chances,” He sighs loudly, not willing to give up on Clarke. “I do what’s necessary to protect my people, my friends and especially those I _love_.” There it was, the words he’s been holding back for years, even a century. He _loved_ a girl who was currently locked in the horror of her past, he _loved_ someone who never thought she was worthy to be cared for, he _loved_ a girl so much that he would fight for her safety. No matter if the cost meant a knife in the leg, or exhaustion seeping through him like a gust of wind. 

 

Josephine is quick in facing him again as she turns to him in a flash, “I would say it’s a sweet confession, but sadly the woman you care so much about isn’t going to come back.” 

 

“You can’t keep saying that to me,” He fights her, a gaze of harsh steel when she looks down at him. 

 

“Why?” She questioned. “Does it hurt too much, does it feel like a stab to the heart where the pain never seems to end? Or a knife to the thigh because you couldn’t keep your hands off Clarke when she was in danger.” Josephine’s voice is low, filled with authority and strength. She’s trying so hard to be someone she isn’t, and Bellamy had enough. He couldn’t do this anymore, he had to do something, anything to save Clarke. “I think he name was Roan, the king or _someth_ —“

 

” _Stop_ ,” Bellamy demands, although his voice is shaking and he can’t do anything about it. He can’t control himself, “The girl I know doesn’t die like this, she wouldn’t allow it.” 

 

“Oh, really?” Josephine asks, voice raising an octave so that she’s yelling at him. “Look at _me_ , Bellamy! I’m a different person, I’m another girl living in a body of a person that doesn’t exist anymore. Clarke is dead, and you need to realize that” Her hand reaches forward to grab Bellamy’s chin, forcing him to look at her when his gaze averts. 

 

“She’s gone because of you, because your parents are greedy and ruthless and _immoral_ —“ Bellamy pulls at his restraints with a surge of anger, a deep emotion that fills his stomach and every vein in his body. He doesn’t feel the pain, or the warm liquid of blood that’s dripping down his wrists onto the floor. He can’t feel a thing, “I know what people like Russel do, they use people to create new lives for their families. It’s because you’re afraid to pass it along, to make new generations follow your traditions.” 

 

“You’re acting like a saint now?” She steps back, admiring the man in front of her with humor. She can’t help but smile to herself, “You’re acting like what you and Clarke did on Earth was an act of _innocence_?” Josephine paused, “You’re just like the Primes, maybe even worse.” 

 

“That’s a pathethic excuse,” Bellamy responds, a snark to his words. “I’ve done what I _needed_ to do, it’s your parents who are selfish.” 

 

“I see no difference.” 

 

“Why is that?” Bellamy bites back, he shrugs and leans back in his chair as best he could. This has to be surreal, it had to be a joke. “Is it because I’m _that_ stubborn to help you?” He’s beginning to act careless, oblivious to the consequences that could follow. “Or is it the fact that I might kill you at the end of all of this?” 

 

“You actually think you’re getting out of here?” A look of surprise written on her face, “The only way you’re leaving this room is if you agree to my terms, and mine _only_ , where you help me escape so that I can find Gabriel.” 

 

Bellamy’s head perks up, eyes filled with a sudden understanding and not fear. 

 

“That’s not fair,” He could feel the way his throat burned, how his body acted on instinct to swallow his emotions before it got the best of him—the lesson he learned as a leader with his heart hanging on his sleeve— and he feels _so_ defeated. “You _can’t_ ,” He stuttered, emotions getting the worst of him. “You can’t just leave with Clarke like that.” 

 

“Bellamy, you can’t stop me.” Even with such a familiar face, his name coming from Clarke’s (Josephine, he needed to remind himself) mouth didn’t sound the same. He didn’t want to hear it, and he looked to the side. “I’m here to stay, and I have to find my love again. He’s the only reason why I keep letting my parents do this to these girls, I _need_ him to survive.”

 

”I need Clarke too,” Bellamy bites his tongue and feels his eyes well up with tears and he doesn’t stop them. He licks his lips, deciding to just pour his heart out and see what sticks into Clarke’s consciousness because she just has to be inside somewhere. “ _God_ , you have no idea how much I need her to be here with me. She’s one of the most important people in my life, and she didn’t deserve any of this.” 

 

Josephine visibly softens, her eyes narrowed down and maybe it was the Clarke influence in her brain, or something else entirely but she leans forward and placed a hand on Bellamy’s cheek. 

 

She caresses his skin, and he can’t put himself to move. He’s frozen just like before, but this time—He’s the one stuck in the past, stuck in a time where he wished for things he couldn’t grasp. 

 

“I’m sorry it had to be you,” She says in a whisper, and if Bellamy was paying enough attention he would’ve lost himself in the way it sounded like the _real_ Clarke.

 

”I’m gonna burn this whole place down once I get her back,” Bellamy’s jaw clenched underneath her hand, giving her the only reaction she could receive from him.

 

“I’m sorry it had to be Clarke,” Josephine adds, her hand curling into his neck and he shivers with the action of her fingers combing in the ends of his hair. “You guys didn’t deserve to be ripped apart from eachother, I actually feel _bad_  that you never had the chance to tell her you loved her, or that you want to be with her.” Her mouth tilts into a half smile, her white teeth showing and tongue stuck in between the rows like a small child would act. “But, its short lived because I’m getting what you can’t have.” 

 

Bellamy feels his heart twist in his chest and it’s such a painful realization, the thought of never seeing Clarke again if Josephine runs away for the rest of her life, that leaves him no other choice than to whimper. He’s empty, numb to emotion and thoughts of only the blonde in front of him. 

 

“I can’t let you do that.” He says, a simple and confident statement. His leg bounces up and down, a nervous habit that he picked up early. “I _can’t_ let you run away.” 

 

“Are you going to help me?” She asks. 

 

For some odd reason, she’s the one with hope blooming in her chest. 

 

“I can’t watch as you get to find the love of your life, the one person you keep coming back to every time your parents do this to people.” Josephine frowns, and Bellamy could feel a single tear run down his cheek. It wasn’t fair, to have a chance at love with someone that got ripped away from you. “What your parents did to Clarke, I _can’t_ forgive them,” He pauses to remember what he would tell others, that forgiveness was easy to some people he cared about. Bellamy couldn’t imagine a life without them, so he lets it come easy. It’s what his relationship with Clarke is built upon. 

 

Josephine’s voice is gentle, “I just needed you to help create a distraction and a valid reason for Clarke to escape without anyone getting suspicious.” The venom returns quickly, “Although it doesn’t seem like the rest of your friends care about her enough to do something.” 

 

“She matters to me,” Bellamy tries to get Josephine’s hand off of his face, nudging or turning his head fast enough to where she’s caught off guard. “I’m the person you should be scared of, forget everyone else.” 

 

“I figured,” Josephine added. “That’s why I’m not letting you leave, now that you know the truth about me.” 

 

“The _truth_?, that’s what you don’t want me to expose?” Bellamy doesn’t hold back as Josephine pulls her hand away and he takes a deep breath, he prays that Clarke could hear him. He wants her to listen, pay attention to everything he has to say. “You’re a puppet to your parents, willing to do anything to get back to the person you love most. Willing to disobey the people who bring you back to life, to run away with him. You’re just a girl with no motive to live besides living for pleasure and love, and that’s just ridiculous.” 

 

Josephine stumbles back with the intensity of his statement. Her eyes scan the table next to him, the small viles that held the power to sedate the man in front of her. Could she do it? 

 

“That’s the reason to live, Bellamy. It makes sense why it took you so long to realize that you loved Clarke.” Josephine replied, keeping her arms strictly at her sides to distract him from what she really wants to do. _If she could just reach_. 

 

“I’ve always loved her,” Bellamy doesn’t hesitate, hissing in pain when he tries to massage his hands and straighten them out again. Now, he felt _everything_ hit him at once. “ _We_ experienced war, loss and celebration together. It was the struggle of losing _her_ during the death wave, knowing I had to live my life without her for six years that changed me. It was the struggle of trying to act normal with a woman who _still_ took my breath away after thinking she was dead when I had to grow up,” 

 

Josephine cuts him off when he pauses for a breath. “Bellamy, you—“ 

 

It was his turn to smile through every emotion he felt; fear, anger, relief, and motivation. 

 

“I grew up.” He states, “I had to learn to love someone else, I had to learn what it was like to sacrifice her happiness for the well-being of our friends. I thought that I had to learn to love _her_ again, but it came back. If anything, that _grew_ too.” 

 

“Bellamy, you can stop now. I understand and I’m _sorry_ that I can’t change what happened—“

 

“You understand what it’s like to be in love, Josephine?” He asks, and she nods slowly. Her body still with watching his every move. “I _can’t_ help you with anything, I don’t want to leave this room if Clarke isn’t the person I’m talking to if you leave.” 

 

“I need Gabriel, I have to find him. You have to understand that simple fact.” She rambles on his words, “The love I have for him is once in a lifetime, you have to get why I’m doing this.” She rubs her face with her hands, frustrated with why she can’t get through to him. Wasn’t Bellamy supposed to be loyal to the girl? 

 

He’s so stubborn, hard-headed and a man with a heart so big that it gets him in trouble. Bellamy knows this, he also knows that he never backed down from a chance at doing what’s truly right. If he adds Clarke into the equation, he would risk his life on a grand gesture to get her back. 

 

With a heart that’s aching in his chest, his hands tied behind his back with bloody wrists, his back twisting in knots as he fights back a groan to express the pain he’s feeling, he spoke. 

 

“It’s not right,” He says, “Not any of this and I’m only being nice to you because _I_ understand.” Bellamy looks up at Josephine who’s close to tears herself, but mostly of her own despair and anticipation. “It’s not fair to have multiple chances to be with the love of _your_ life. Especially, when you have a man who’s desperate to do anything for a woman you’re taking hostage, tied to a chair because he’s too smart for you people.” 

 

He adds on, a sweet promise in his ears but a horrid one for Josephine Lightbourne. 

 

“I’m the one who’s desperate,” Bellamy reminds them both. “Desperate for a chance to be with a woman your parents killed, because she’s the love of _my_ life.” 

 

“Do you believe she’s dead now?” 

 

“No, not at all.” Bellamy said, closing his eyes to think of Clarke’s smile and sparks of blue when all he could see is darkness for a few seconds. “I’m gonna find a way to get her back, even if I have to stay here when you run away. Because even when Clarke and I are seperated, we always find our way back to eachother.” 

 

He could see the way her hands shake with that answer, like she didn’t expect the strong connection between them. 

 

“Just like you and Gabriel,” He says with a small smile, and the situation suddenly becomes more tolerable. “So you should start thinking, because nothing is gonna stop me once I’m out of his chair. I’m alive because of Clarke, the experiences I’ve had over the years, they all lead me back to her.” 

 

Bellamy sits back, letting his hands hang freely behind his back, ignoring the sting and tension filling the room. The weight of burying his feelings, finally lifted from his shoulders because Clarke had a chance to hear this. Even if she didn’t, if she couldn’t, he would tell her this in person. 

 

“This has never happened before,” 

 

Josephine shocks them, her shoulders giving up on holding her posture. “No one has fought this hard for someone I’ve taken over.” 

 

“You didn’t meet someone like me, yet.” 

 

That— _that_ statement is what awakens something inside Bellamy. Clarke held the power to break, mend and shatter Bellamy’s heart. It’s because he lets her do it, and now, he just hoped with every fiber in his body that she trusted him enough to do what’s right. To do what was right to bring her back safely, to put the pieces of her heart back together _._

 

He could do this, he could save _Clarke._

 


End file.
